Public Speaking: 
Numbers are Funny
Most businesses
have numerous uses for numbers, both written and oral. Some numbers are funnier
and more interesting than others. A number like zero has other names that are
funny that aren't even numbers.
-
Doughnut
- Goose egg
- Nada
- Nil
- Zip, and
- Zilch
These are all
funny ways to express the number zero. Even zero is funnier than the word none.
Although none is funny when you talk about the two chances of a hostile
takeover as "slim and none." A hundred dollar bill is a C-Note,
a five-dollar bill is a fin. If someone is outrageously rich, they could
be a zillionaire.
If you want
to exaggerate a little bit, or if you have some tough news to deliver that involves
numbers, in your public speaking, add a touch of levity to help soothe the sting.
One common rule
of humor that does not apply to numbers is brevity. In all other types
of humor you should conserve the number of words you use. Normally you want
to use the fewest words possible to get to the punch line. When using numbers
in public speaking, pronounce them using the longest version possible. This
gives them more punch. The digits 1,500 should be recited as one thousand
five hundred, not fifteen hundred. The time of 8:15 should be
a quarter past eight, not eight fifteen. 6'2" should be six
feet two inches not six-two.
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